6 steps to discovering your true self.

Yes, life is supposed to be full of trials and errors, but this allows you to find the best areas to experience. Once you know yourself, you will become more confident, understand your purpose and begin to have a greater impact on the world.

So how can you know who you are and what you are meant to do in life? Here are the six steps you need to take to know the real you:

1. Be silent.

You cannot and will not know yourself until you take the time to be still. Many people don’t know themselves because any kind of silence scares them; it’s too uncomfortable to be alone with all the flaws staring back at them. But until you get alone, evaluate yourself and be completely honest with yourself, you can’t really see all the facets of your life – the good and the bad. Be silent and discover the real you.

2. Realise who you really are, not who you want to be.

I know you already have a fixed idea of who you desperately want to be, but it may not be who you were designed to be. When you know who you are, you will finally see where you and your specific gifts fit in the big picture.

And while there are many points along your journey to help you discover yourself, the best way to start is to take a personality test and the StrengthsFinder test. (If it’s been five or more years since you’ve taken either of these, take them again). No, these self-assessments are not perfect, but they point out your main areas of strength, so you can focus on the change you are destined to bring to the world.

3. Find out what you’re good at (and what you’re not).

This may be the most difficult step in discovering who you are, but it is necessary. Of course, you have to try and fail to find what you’re good at, and no, I don’t want you to give up before you’ve tried enough, but knowing when to quit is a gift everyone needs to learn.

Give up when you’ve invested too much time and your efforts don’t pay off. What’s enough time? Only you can decide. But when you quit correctly, it’s not that you give up, it’s that you make room for something better. When your actions do nothing but exhaust you – instead of producing more passion and increasing your drive to do more – it’s a good sign that it’s time to focus on something else. Your strengths will show you who you are.

4. Find what you are passionate about.

Following passion of any kind is a good thing, and you need to pay attention when it comes because it shows an area of life that you need to pay more attention to. If we talk about following your passion at work, it’s a good thing. And if we talk about having more passion for life, it’s a good thing. Focus more on passion, understand yourself better and you will have a greater impact. Passion produces effort and continuous effort produces results.

5. Ask for feedback.

If you don’t know yourself, listening to what others have to say about you is a useful practice. Ask them two simple questions: “What strengths do you think I need to develop further?” and “What weaknesses do you think I need to work on? Of course, their opinion is not going to be perfect, but their comments will probably point you to some areas where you should at least take a second look. This step is especially important for those who are stuck in the search for themselves. Sometimes those closest to us can see something that we may not be able to see in ourselves.

6. Evaluate your relationships.

A great aspect of knowing yourself can be found in your relationships. When you realise that you will never truly know anyone until you discover yourself, the importance of knowing yourself becomes even more apparent. This is especially true for business leaders, because if you don’t know the people on your team, you are lost as a leader. But this rule also applies to any relationship in your life. Almost as much as you need to know yourself, others also need to know who you are. People need you, the real you.

Use your reflections to fight your greatest fears, because when you understand who you are, your purpose will ultimately be greater than your fears. When you realise who you are, you will spend less time brooding. Focusing on your strengths gives you the traction you need to make a bigger and better difference in the world. When you know yourself, you’ll find more peace and success will come faster than ever.

Now take action and find the real you, starting today.